Designing Joy: How You Can Plan And Design The Perfect Celebration That's Absolutely Bursting With Joy.

BRINGING JOY TO OUR LIVES

"If we don't take the time and energy to celebrate the moments, relationships and wins in our lives, it will feel less meaningful and special. In turn, we feel less joy and fulfilment. Bring more meaning into your world by celebrating and honouring those special moments and people."

This quotation by Stephanie Zamora is the inspiration and driving force behind Little Lace Flower Company. I truly believe in the power of celebration to make our lives richer and create connection. 

With every wedding and celebration I design with clients, I strive to guide them beyond the 'trendy' and the 'pretty' in order to help them create a celebration that is truly authentic to them. As a collaborative designer, I'm always researching ways to help clients achieve this. For me, it's all about empowering clients to develop a clear vision and become informed decision-makers.

In the earlier Blogs I have written, I focused on ways to make weddings and celebrations more meaningful: "9 Ways To Make Your Wedding Meaningful and Special", and "11 Heart-Felt Family Unity Rituals To Give Your Wedding Ceremony Meaning" (to read these, head back to my Blog).

In this Blog, I'm going to talk about designing your wedding (or indeed, any celebration) that is authentic and joyful to you. It's all about helping you to think about the following:

• How can you find and express 'your joy'?
• What makes you feel joy?
• What design elements can we add to your celebration to bring moments of joy to both you and your guests?
• What special little bursts of joy would make your celebration special, meaningful and memorable?

Ingrid Fetell Lee's Book "Joyful"

The origins of this Blog began when I happened upon the wonderful Ingrid Fetell Lee and her extraordinary book "Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things to Create Extraordinary Happiness". This book is a real game-changer, I highly recommend you grab a copy.

Before I discovered Ingrid's book, I had been researching ways I could help clients 'find their joy' in a way that could be harnessed in the design of their celebration. I had amassed cute quotations, created several questionnaires, written a checklist, but nothing seemed to quite nail it.

In Fetell Lee's imagery and categories for different ways of feeling and expressing joy, I finally found a way to create the perfect deign tool. Based on her work, I created collage tiles as a tool for launching conversations about joy with clients. In this Blog, I'll share these with you.

WHAT IS "JOY" AND WHY IS IT IMPORTANT FOR CELEBRATIONS?

First things first, let's start by defining joy. The American Psychological Association Writes:

"JOY n. a feeling of extreme gladness, delight, or exultation of the spirit arising from a sense of well-being or satisfaction. The feeling of joy may take two forms: passive and active. Passive joy involves tranquility and a feeling of contentment with things as they are. Active joy involves a desire to share one’s feelings with others. It is associated with more engagement of the environment than is passive joy. The distinction between passive and active joy may be related to the intensity of the emotion, with active joy representing the more intense form. Both forms of joy are associated with an increase in energy and feelings of confidence and self-esteem."

The urge to celebrate an important life event is inextricably tied to active joy. It is in our human nature to want to share our good news, connect with others and have them celebrate with us. Even the most introverted of us needs to reach out, share and connect. That is why loneliness is such a stressful and harmful state for us.

And the cool thing? The more we share our joy, the more joy that we get back. As Mark Twain said:

"To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with."

So, to create a truly authentic, meaningful and life-affirming celebration, we need to put JOY at the centre of our planning and design. And if we do so, the math of joy tells us that we will feel even more joy. And the more joy we feel, the more life-affirming  our celebration will be.

Another super cool thing is that celebrations which have a really joyous feel are more memorable. And, in my experience, the clients that I work with with have "creating a wonderful, memorable guest experience" pretty high up on their must-have list. 

As a 'Psychology Today' article (8/10/2015) puts it:

"The experience of emotion enhances our memories. A normal function of emotion is to enhance memory in order to improve recall of experiences that have importance or relevance for our survival. Emotion acts like a highlighter that emphasizes certain aspects of experiences to make them more memorable."

So what emotions are the best 'highlighters'? Research shows  (Science Daily, 7/10/2007) that it's those associated with heightened states of emotion - fear, anger ( ...the yucky negative ones) and JOY!!! Yay for joy.

Joy Versus Happiness

There are SO many definitions of joy versus happiness that I could spend the entire Blog listing them. For the purpose of planning and designing celebrations, I think it's useful to see happiness as more a sense of well-being and a positive outlook on life. It is linked to longer-term life choices, experiences and events. Joy is more 'in the moment'. This is in line with American psychologist Paul Eckman who proposed six basic emotions: fear, anger, joy, sadness, disgust, and surprise. We can see joy as an emotional response to an experience (or, of course, the memory of an experience).

When we create a celebration, we may not be able to change our guests' overall sense of happiness, but we sure can bring them wonderful bursts of joy. And we'll know we've succeeded when we see these tell-tale signs of joy: 

 Smiling, laughing, giggling, making whooping sounds, clapping, dancing, skipping, happy surprise, awe and an urge to jump up and down!        

 

THE AESTHETICS OF JOY 

What brings us joy? That's a HUGE question. But for this Blog, from a celebration planning and design perspective, we will focus on design elements that can be used to create a sense of joy: colour, light, florals, décor, etc. These are the things that we can incorporate into a wedding or celebration to actively plan and design for joy. 

We are all unique and individual personalities. The design elements that trigger joy in me may be very different than that for you. This is where Ingrid Fetell Lee's book is so useful. As a designer and researcher, she identified different types of joy aesthetics. Each aesthetic appeals to a different type of person.  

Using Fetell Lee's "Aesthetic of Joy" categories, we can more easily explore and express which design elements make us (and those that we love) feel joy. And from this, draw up a plan and design for our celebration.

So, what are these categories? The remainder of this Blog will focus on describing them.

USE THIS BLOG AS A PLANNING TOOL

I will present the remainder of this Blog as a planning resource that you can use to identify your joy aesthetic. Or, more likely, aesthetics - chances are you will strongly relate to 2 or 3. I personally see myself situated somewhere between abundance and harmony, with a touch of magic and play to honor my inner child.

 Here are some guidelines for using this Blog:

• Scroll through the collages I've provided. Which ones do you connect with? Which ones make you think of joy? Which ones can you envisage incorporating into your celebration?
• Read notes. Highlight the key words that summarise the look and feel you'd like for your celebration.
• Take note of the design ideas that you think would help you achieve those key words. Use the design ideas list to inspire ideas of your own.

ENERGY

"Vibrant colour gives you a boost of energy. It pulls joy to the surface."

It's The Feeling Of...

Being surrounded by environments that are stimulating; that make us feel alive, invigorated, revitalised and exuberant.

This can most easily be achieved through the use of colour. As Fetell Lee said "Colour is energy made visible". For Weddings, colour is one of the first things couples consider. Colour inspiration can come from many sources, but more often than not couples opt for adding a touch of colour here and there to what is a pretty standard faire of white, taupe, dusky pink and grey or blue for the boys. If you are planning a wedding and Energy is your joy aesthetic, take this as your permission to go bold. To break free of norms and let your bright and energetic self out!

Think...

• Recharging our batteries on warm, sunny vacations. 
• The infectious energy and exuberance of carnivals, festivals, dance floors.
• The buzz and bustle of a city street at night.

It's The Opposite Of...

Lack-lustre, dreary environments. Draining situations. The cold.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• If bright colour brings you joy, then be brave and set aside traditions such as white and pale blush pinks for weddings. The result will be a celebration that feels more authentic and brings you a lot more joy.
• Go wild and ask your wedding guests to wear certain colours. Alternatively, get them all to wear white whilst you and your partner splash out in colour.
• If completely ditching traditional white is too daunting, consider adding strong pops of vibrant colour to add interest and focal points.
• Include stimulating colours such as red, yellow, orange, turquoise, electric blue, violet.

• Themes
• Think about environments that make you feel alive and energised: tropical holidays, carnivals, festivals, city nightlife, dance clubs.
• If tropical isn't your thing, think Indian pinks and oranges or the bright citrus colours of an orchard in the Italian countryside.

• Guest Experience
• A warm and welcoming entrance that feels like a big hug. 
• Buzzy, energetic entertainment and dance floor.
• Spaces that encourage lively, friendly interactions.

• Venue: 
• Look for venues with naturally bright, energetic décor. Modern art galleries are perfect. 
• Alternatively, seek out venues with plain white walls that can be lit up with colourful lighting. 
• If the energy of a tropical location appeals, consider a destination wedding. Alternatively, recreate the tropical look with décor, food and florals.

• Food and Décor
• Make your food and décor items brightly coloured. This applies to stationery, florals, fabrics, signs, serveware, etc. 
• Include elements associated with warm, tropical environments: pineapples, tropical flowers, vibrant fabric colours with tropical prints.

• Florals
• Big, bold, bright florals. Sunflowers. Citrus.  Exotic, tropical flowers and foliage.

• Lighting
• Lighting is a powerful element of this aesthetic.
• People tend to move towards light areas. We can use lighting to bring guests together and increase connection. 
• Bursts of light increases the feeling of energy in a room. This can be used to great effect in zones such as the dance floor. 
• Lower light and 'mood' lighting can be used to encourage quiet, intimate activity, such as chatting around a dining table.
• Think about adding the fizzy energy of fluorescent colours and neon signs.
• Consider employing the services of a lighting technician.

ABUNDANCE

"The wild, deliriously joyful feeling of being a kid in a candy store."

It's The Feeling Of...

Being in stimulating, interesting environments. Spaces that you want to explore - that are multi-layered, multi-faceted, generous, sumptuous, lush.

When it comes to planning a celebration, it can also include the wonderful feeling associated with giving and generosity and bountiful celebrations. And the excited anticipation as you watch someone unwrap a gift you have spent time and effort selecting for them. 

As Ingrid writes: 

"Abundance is an expression of deep human delight. It's an acknowledgement that we are here to do more than eek out an existence between birth and death and chores. We are here... to live not just the length of our lives, but the width of them as well. We are here to see rainbows and paint them, to be tickled and enthralled, to eat a second cupcake if we choose and occasionally to feel the truth of May West’s famous aphorism 'Too much of a good thing can be wonderful”'.

Alas, abundance can easily be mistaken for overindulgence, gluttony and blown budgets. The trick is to think carefully about what areas you most want to splurge on and to plan accordingly. If a bountiful buffet is your dream, then perhaps your guests don't need those individually monogrammed napkins! Go down your checklist of 'To do's and mark them either "splurge" or "save".

Think...

• Being 'a kid in a candy store'. 
• The giddy feeling of having more than you need and more than you can chose from. 'Overflowing with joy'. 
• 'Brimming with happiness'. '
• 'My cup runneth over'.
• The 'hostess with the mostess'

It's The Opposite Of...

Bare, stark environments. Bland spaces. Spartan, minimalist design.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Lots of colour, layered and patterned. Think about richly coloured embroideries, ethnic textiles, floral chintz.

• Themes
• Imagine being in an opulent, grand old hotel: Luxe fabrics (chintz, satin, lace, velvet), embroidery, richly patterned fabrics, fabric pooling on the floor, cabbage roses, tropical florals, tassels, fringes, pompoms, pleats, gathers, swags, fabulous ornament collections to explore, generous comfy furniture.
• Think about being at an exciting flea-market: an eclectic collection of décor items, colours, quirky finds. vintage pieces.
• For a fun theme, think circuses, carnivales.
• For a nostalgic feel, think about childhood birthday parties.

• Guest Experience
• Just as we are made to feel special on our Birthday when we are given gifts, cakes and party food, providing your guests with a feeling of abundance makes them feel special, wanted and loved.
• Generosity: overflowing buffets, candy bars, grazing tables, lots of choices.
• Lots of variety for guests to experience. This acts to make guests more interested and attentive - with the added benefit of making your celebration more memorable. 
• Imagine you guests being transported to a wonderland overflowing with things to experience and explore.  

• Venues
• Grand old hotels, ballrooms and stately City Halls are perfect locations.
• If you are seeking a more modern look, seek out one of the art hotels such as The Museum Hotel or the Naumi Hotel in Wellington.
• For a more eclectic or whimsical feel, research venues such as libraries, museums, art galleries, markets.

• Food and Décor
• Sensorial richness: Abundance can be negatively associated with waste, obesity and hoarding. But well before we get to the unhealthy end of 'too muchness', there is the joyous zone of enough stuff to provide delight, stimulation and challenge.

• Variety: The iconic image of this is the rainbow - its stripes, multiple hues and vibrant energy creates a feeling of joy, exuberance and cheerfulness. Variety can be added via objects, shapes, colours, textures, scents, patterns, etc. Think: overflowing urns of garden flowers, scented flowers, multi-coloured fabrics for table linens, different table layouts, photo displays, games and activities, multiple rooms/locations to explore, menu options, individual place-settings and so on.

• Repetition: Small things repeated many times create a bursting, overflowing sensation of joy. Lots of one thing creates a sense of occasion. For example, confetti, stripes, multi-coloured fabrics, patterned fabrics, polka dots, flags, patchwork quilts, fairy lights, sprinkles, glitter, balloon installations, floral installations, buffets, candy jars, donut walls, rows of champagne glasses. 

• Grouping: An abundant celebration is not the same as an overflowing clutter of stuff. It's about creating a rich palette of sensation - looks, smells, textures, tastes. In fact, as Ingrid points out, having an uncluttered, orderly space enables us to enjoy these sensations better, like "weeding to create a beautiful garden". Combine Abundance with the 'Harmony' aesthetic which involves grouping objects to create pleasing patterns. (Personally, this is where I find my joy - abundant, generous décor grouped into pleasing, harmonious patterns). Create vignettes and displays to bring order to the abundance.

• Florals
• Overflowing urns of garden glowers. Garlands, Sways, Scented flowers adding another sensation to enjoy. Lots of interesting texture and colour. Lush foliage.
• Dense arrangements with a lot of different flower and foliage types.
• Generous, full flowers such as Cabbage Roses.

• Lighting
• Lighting is all about adding interest and variety. Consider a range of lighting effects and colours. Spotlights, colour washes, candles. 

FREEDOM

"The joy of escaping into nature and feeling footloose and fancy free."

It's The Feeling Of...

Escape - the feeling you get when you leave behind the stresses and worries of daily life - even if only for a brief moment. Like taking a walk on grass during your lunch break.

It is also the feeling of being unrestrained, carefree and the alleviation of constraints. 

This is often linked to being in nature - open fields, lakes, parks and beaches. It's the feeling of relaxing and letting go when connecting with nature.

If you feel strongly drawn to nature and natural environments, then consider designing your wedding or celebration around the Freedom Aesthetic. If you are getting married, consider a destination wedding, or seeking out a venue that is located in your favourite outdoor space. 

Think...

• The feeling you had as a kid when racing out of school at the end of the day
• Stretching your legs after being cooped up in the car for hours
• 'Footloose and fancy-free', 'Free-wheeling'
• 'Escaping to nature' and the release of stress
• The sense of well-being when you feel connected to nature
• The joy we get from the full range of sensations we feel when in nature
• The scent, colours and textures of plants and natural objects
• The warmth of sunlight on your skin
• The sound of water
• The feeling of a light breeze on damp skin

It's The Opposite Of...

Stiff, restrictive, confining spaces. Artificial, man-made environments and objects.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Colours associated with nature: forests, beaches, sea, sand, earth, wood, stone.
• Softer, relaxing palettes with a Boho vibe.

• Themes
• The great outdoors: If you strongly relate to the Freedom Aesthetic, then it makes sense to create a celebration based on the outdoors: sea, beach, woodland, forest, countryside, farm, etc. 
• If you can't be outdoors, then select a venue with great views of the outdoors. Or a marquee with a clear roof and side panels. If the celebration layout can be oriented to make the most of natural views and indoor-outdoor flow, all the better!

• Sustainability: Hand-in-hand with the Freedom Aesthetic is a concern for sustainability and caring for nature. In fact, undertaking acts of care for the environment are a source of joy in itself. This can be incorporated into your celebration design via your choice of vendors, buying local, and using recycled, upcycled and reusable elements.

• Guest Experience
• The location of your celebration will be a major part of the guest experience. Enhance this by thinking about orientation to maximise views, sensations.
• Include nature/outdoor activities such as an animal encounter, woodland walk, evening bonfire, etc.
• Ensure that guest don't suffer in the 'great outdoors' - provide sunscreen, insect spray, rugs, parasols, etc.
• Think about camping/glamping to enable guests to enjoy their surrounds longer.

• Venue
• This is the cornerstone of the Freedom Aesthetic. Look for a venue that lets you be part of your favourite outdoor space. If it doesn't exist, think of hiring a marquee, or perhaps a festival weekend where guests stay in tents and enjoy extended time in the outdoors.

• Food and Decor
• Create a more relaxed, informal vibe.
• Select natural fibre fabrics (such as cotton, linen, wool) with nature motifs and soft, natural colours.
• Adding natural décor items (e.g. driftwood, cones, shells, stones, etc).
• Avoid highly structured décor items.
• Add a water feature.
• Include natural soundtracks to help create a relaxed vibe - e.g. birdsong.

• Florals
• Opt for a more wild style of floral arrangements.  This might include foraged leaves, seeds, cones, nuts, moss, stones, twigs and wild flowers. 
• Add touches of nature: potted plants, lush greenery, adding different textures and shapes with flowers and foliage.
• 'Escaping to nature' can be created with even small touches of nature - a group of potted plants, an outdoor balcony, a little water feature, a patch of lawn. These small encounters can have a powerful effect on our sense of well-being and feeling of joy.

• Lighting
• Candle light, fairy lights and festoons create a relaxed feel.
• If possible, lights a bonfire for guests to  gather around.

HARMONY

"The joy of order as a sign of care and effort put into something special."

It's The Feeling Of...

The deep joy you feel  when you see a row of dancers moving in perfect synchronicity. Its about the arrangement and geometric configuration of objects to create a sense of calm, balance, peace and joyful order. 

The joy comes from the sense of order as opposed to the objects themselves. This involves arranging objects in rhythmic patterns, and symmetrical groupings.  It confirms a need within us to feel that life is an orderly endeavour. As Fetell Lee explains:

Harmony offers visible evidence that someone cares enough about a place to invest energy in it. Disorder has the opposite effect. Disorderly environments have been linked to feelings of powerlessness, fear, anxiety and depression and they exert a subtle negative influence on people’s behaviour.

It's also about achieving a flow state where everything works smoothly without any conscious effort.

Think...

• Our brains are wired to seek out correlations and connections in our environment. Joy is the reward we get we we find this. 
• We feel delight when individual objects are arranged into collections according to size, colour, shape, and so on.
• If our environment feels stable, balanced and ordered, we feel more in control of our life and more able to take on challenges. 
• We can also find joy in natural objects that show harmony. For example, the symmetry of reflections in water, the radial symmetry of snowflakes, wave patterns. This creates a sensation of everything working together to sustain life.
• For some, the beauty of symmetrical forms and patterns in nature is proof of a higher order which provides another layer of joy.

It's The Opposite Of...

Disordered, chaotic environments. Decay. Situations that feel unstable, overwhelming or uncomfortably 'out of whack'.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• We draw upon the harmony 'joy reward' when we create colour palettes. This enables us to put together complex designs and multiple elements that have structure and unity through the repetition of a restricted number of colours.
• Following the 'rules' of colour theory and the colour wheel ensures that your colour palette will be harmonious and feel satisfying to look at.
• For a calm, peaceful feeling to your celebration, opt for a palette using soft, muted colours and analogous colours (site beside each other on the colour wheel). Other options are monotone palettes featuring one colour and ombre effects.
• Use strong, bright colours sparingly.

• Themes
• Think about traditional, formal, symmetrical architecture, sculptures and gardens. Use this as inspiration for your event.
• Think Zen gardens.
• The serene, uncluttered atmosphere of an art gallery.

• Guest Experience
• It's all about creating a stress-free, peaceful environment that is easy to relax and socialise in.
• Across most cultures, the circle is associated with joyous harmony. It is infinitely symmetrical and equal. Sitting in circles is universally recognised as better for socialising and creating a feeling of equality. In celebrations, this might be used for table layouts and the design of socialising spaces.

• Venue
• Seek out venues with old villas built symmetrically and formal gardens laid out along axis lines. This will make the job of creating harmony easier.
• Alternatively, consider a marquee where the blank-tablet allows you to create a perfectly harmonious layout from scratch.

• Food and Décor
• Symmetry is the flagship method for creating Harmony. Bilateral symmetry is, effectively, when an object is mirrored. Radial symmetry can be seen in snowflakes, mandalas, stars, and so on. 
• The effect of symmetry to create a sense of calm and control is, I believe, behind the universal preference for serene, symmetrical and harmonious wedding ceremony backdrops. They offer a sense of peace, support and calm during what is - let's face it - a HUGE, life-changing event.
• A bilaterally symmetrical ceremony backdrop might be achieved in many ways, e.g. wedding arch, paired floral plinths, a central table with paired candlesticks, paired floral urns, etc. The effect is traditional, serene and formal.
• Bilateral symmetry can also be introduced in wedding ceremonies through the mirrored layout of guests chairs either side of the aisle which acts as the central axis.
• For a variation on the usual bilateral symmetry of a wedding ceremony, consider radial symmetry. Have guest chairs arranged around the ceremony space. Use candles or florals to create a ceremony circle to stand within as you recite your vows.
• The radial symmetry of snowflakes and stars is perennially popular for celebration décor design.
• Careful layout plans and placement of focal points will enhance symmetry.

• Balance - strictly symmetrical designs can feel a little rigid and boring. A more interesting and stimulating option is to aim for balance. This is where dissimilar objects are carefully grouped together to create an overall sense of balance. 
• Consider a ceremony backdrop that uses balance design principles. For example, your arch might have a floral decoration in one corner, and a second one of equal visual 'weight' lower down on the opposite side of the decorated corner..
• Group décor items together to create balanced displays. For example, a tall vase of florals on one side, balanced by a shorter vase and a votive candle holder on the other side. The success of these groupings relies on having a strong focal point around which the other objects are anchored.
• Another way of achieving balance is via the rule of thirds: this is a composition guideline that places your subject in the left or right third of an image, leaving the other two thirds more open.

• "Perfectly imperfect" designs create a great sense of pleasure and joy also. Examples include Ikat Weaving and traditional patchwork quilts made from scrap fabrics. Nothing is perfectly symmetrical, but the overall effect creates harmony. Balance is achieved not through a strict formula, but when it 'just looks right'. 
• 'Perfectly imperfect' effects can be created by careful grouping. For example, small vases holding different sprigs of flowers are arranged down a table. None of the vases match, but overall they create a gorgeous flow of colour, shape and texture.

• Patterns: Across cultures, patterns provide a great sense of joy. They allow us to enjoy abundance without the feeling of clutter or overwhelm. And, as mentioned earlier, our brains are hard-wired to prefer patterns. This is not just in objects that we see, but in music and in activities. repetition and pattern act to soothe and de-stress us.
• Add patterns via embroideries, lace, weaving, traditional and cultural fabrics, orderly rows of table décor elements, repeating colours and motifs, festoons and bunting, escort cards laid out in radiating circles, lines of beautifully set-out chairs, and so on.
• Combine the Abundance and Harmony Aesthetics: use the concept of balance, patterns and grouping to organise a sumptuous display that is interesting but not overwhelming.

• Florals
• Harmonious florals often have a strict colour palette so that all the various types, textures and forms work perfectly together.
• Use the placement of floral arrangements to enhance symmetry.
• Harmony can also be create through repeating a limited selection of elements.
• Consider the balance achieved through Ikebana-inspired arrangements.
• Careful grouping mixed vases and flowers to create 'perfectly imperfect' effects.

• Lighting
• Lighting can be used to enhance symmetry, e.g. uplights on plinths, spotlights on the centre of the dance floor..
• Soft lighting at guest tables helps to create a calm, peaceful ambience.

PLAYFULNESS

"Play is one of the greatest means of accessing joy and delight."

It's The Feeling Of...

"Playfulness: the quality of being light-hearted or full of fun."

Being spontaneous, fun, childlike, silly, creative. A sense of releasing our inner child. 

As Ingrid points out, play is one of our greatest means of accessing joy and delight.  In fact, THE measure of the success of play is the amount of joy created. It is the only activity we engage in solely for the purpose of feeling joy. It is the source of much of the joyful memories we hold. 

Think...

• Play is the antidote to being jaded.
• We are born with a drive to seek out and experience play.
• Play gives us the opportunity to experience a flow state. 
• As adults, we are conditioned to think of play as frivolous. But the play impulse is always within us. We still desire the joy and flow state that play can provide; we still want to let our inner child out every now and then. Celebrations are the perfect opportunity to do this.
• Adding playfulness to a celebration design can come with the fear of making it feel silly and frivolous, but it's all about getting the balance right. A touch of playfulness and fun has universal appeal.
• When we add playful elements to our celebration design, we give ourselves and our guests the opportunity (and invitation) to reconnect with our play impulse and feel the joy associated with it. As wedding and event designers, we often describe this as adding an element of whimsy.
• A bonus of playfully challenging tradition is that your event will be more memorable.

It's The Opposite Of...

Sombre, repressed and severe environments. Situations that make us feel stressed and restrained.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Think of childhood colours and cute colours. Pinks and baby blues. The primary colours of childhood toys. Block colours.
• Recall a favourite childhood toy and use the colours as inspiration.

• Themes
• Think: childhood nostagia. Toys. Playgrounds. Kids Parties. Picnics. Fun fairs. Carnivals.
• Think about a favourite childhood book as inspiration, e.g. "Where The Wild Things Are"

• Guest Experience
• Adults need an invitation/excuse to let out their inner child, so give it to them. Provide fun games to play and playful experiences (e.g. photo booth).
• Remind guests of their playful childhood through nostalgic photos, décor items, food.
• Include fun, crazy songs from your childhood to dance to.

• Venue
• Seek out quirky, playful venues such as modern art galleries. Or perhaps, sports and recreation spaces. Or go completely off beat and hire a school hall.

• Food and Decor
• Combine playfulness with the abundance aesthetic to recreate the 'kid in a candy store feeling': lots of fun and interesting things to see and do, overflowing buffets, candy bars, sprinkles,  ice cream vans, candy-floss stands. 

• Rounded Shapes: Play and playfulness is strongly linked to circular shapes. Balls, hula-hoops, rounded corners on toys have been associated with childhood, fun and play for thousands of years. We link these to safe fun, play and childhood. In contrast, sharp objects trigger our fear response. In adulthood, angular objects may look grown-up and chic, but they inhibit our playful response.
• Add rounded shapes to your celebration design to help connect to our playful natures. Think: pompoms, polka-dots, balloons, bubbles, balls, circular paper lanterns, spots on textiles, stationery and signage.
• Also consider using rounded edges, for example on your stationery and signage. And of course, choose fonts with a playful, rounded look to continue the feel.
• Use circle layouts to encourage movement and mingling. 
• For food, think round tubs of sweets, lollipops, cookies, donuts, old-fashioned sweets (I remember fizzy lollies with great fondness).

• Curves: Curvilinear shapes help us to escape the rigid lines and 'rules' of being a serious adult. They've been shown to encourage freer movement around spaces and promote more creative (and less stereotyped) thinking. 
• In wedding and event design, replacing lines with curves can help free us from tradition and create new experiences and possibilities. For example, having curved wedding aisles or having guests forms a circle around a couple as they recite their wedding vows. 
• Less 'radical' options might be to have guest seating charts displayed in curves rather than the usual columns and rows. 
• The current trend towards curved and arch-shaped wedding stationery and signage is another example of replacing lines with curves.

• Cute: Cute things are universally associated with play and joy. The big eyes, rounded bodies and wide-eyed gaze of babies sparks joy in us and ignites a care and protection impulse in us. It is hard-wired in us, a 'survival of the species' behaviour. Cuteness also creates a playful response in us. We want to get down and play with baby. The cuteness effect is what makes cartoons so popular and it's a powerful design and advertising tool. We are attracted to cute things. Cute things bring out our playful side, our inner child.
• How can we add 'cute' to weddings and events? Add cute graphics to your stationery (e.g. a cartoon drawing of your pets), have a fun photo booth with cute accessories, use a cute colour palette, include cute décor items to your table designs.
• Cute foods might include cupcakes, macarons, petit fours, the tiny treats of a high-tea party and childhood treats such as fairy bread.
• What was your favourite toy as a child? Consider adding that to your celebration. For example, if it was a teddy bear,  have a teddy bear motif on your stationery, name your signature cocktails "The Teddy Bear", add a teddy bear to your welcome display and so on.
• Florals
• Include fun, rounded flowers such as Pompom Dahlias and Billy Buttons. 
• Include flowers associated with childhood, e.g. daisies.
• Add playful accessories such as ribbons, origami, balloons, paper stars and rosettes to create more playful floral arrangements.
• Use a playful colour palette. 

• Lighting
• Think about the fun of childhood parties and discos: sparkly fairy lights, disco balls, flashing lights.

SURPRISE

"A small, unexpected burst of joy can have an outsized impact on mood".

It's The Feeling Of...

The happy surprise you get when you encounter a quirky, unexpected or whimsical environment. When your expectations are contradicted by a bold diversion from the normal and predictable.

Happy surprises, whimsy, juxtaposition and gentle unpredictability help us to connect with our childlike wonder and curiosity. As Ingrid explains, they can add child-like freshness to our lives, help us see with 'new eyes' and reset our "joy meters".

An interesting effect of surprise is that it intensifies other emotions – like a magnifying glass. When the surprise is a happy one, it can create a strong feeling of joy and can intensify existing feelings of joy. Even when the surprise is fleeting, the magnifying effect means that a happy surprise can have a lasting effect as it triggers an upward spiral of emotion.

In the same way, adding an element of surprise to your celebration design can have an outsized impact on engaging your guests and making your event memorable. Unremarkable events are predictable events.

Surprise quickly redirects our attention and triggers vigilance. Surprise prompts us to move our attention away from ourselves to our environment – encouraging us to engage, interact and be curious. As Ingrid put its, it acts to "pulls you back into the room".

Think...

• Quirky, oddball and wacky art exhibitions.
• Weird and wonderful couture.
• The wide-eyed wonder and delight of children.
• Incongruence and contrast.
• Alice in Wonderland.

It's The Opposite Of...

Boring, monotonous and predictable situations. Oversimplified and unchallenging environments.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Colour palettes that challenge the norms in terms of 'tradition' and 'good taste'.
• Unexpected colour palettes (e.g. the bride in a bright colour, the guests wear white).
• Objects coloured using the opposite side if the colour wheel (e.g. blue oranges, black wedding dress).
• Colours that reflect a quirky, unexpected theme (e.g. rainbow unicorn wedding).

• Themes
• It's all about being bold and challenging expectations. 
• If you're planning a wedding, resist the urge to thumb through wedding magazines and online blogs. Instead, think about the things, activities and places you love and use that as inspiration for your celebration. Love the water? Have an under-water scuba wedding ceremony! Just don't ask me to be your on site stylist!

• Guest Experience
• The magnifying effect of surprise means that a happy surprise can have a lasting effect on guests as it triggers an upward spiral of emotion. This is why I'm a strong advocate for adding a touch of whimsy (a mixture of surprise and playfulness) to any event I design. 
• Adding an element of surprise will also make your celebration stand out from the crowd and be more memorable for your guests.
• A word of warning, however:  The math of contrast says that the greater the contrast, the greater the surprise. When designing celebrations, you want to aim for enough contrast to create happy surprise and amplify joy. Too much can tip into unpleasant surprise and discomfort for your guests, You don't want your celebration to be remembered for the wrong reasons!
• How can we successfully navigate this? In Ingrid's words, the weird becomes wonderful when it is tied to something we know – so we feel like Alice in Wonderland. For example, if you're going all-in for a fantasy-themed wedding, opt for a more recognisable wedding service so that your guests 'get' what's going on.

• Venue
• What better excuse to hire that off-beat, alternative art gallery or performance space. Or consider a really old-school traditional space that you then decorate with the weird and wonderful - an ideal opportunity to add contrast and juxtaposition. Or maybe find a venue that isn't very venue-like at all for a complete surprise. 

• Food and Décor

• Contrast: As discussed earlier, our brains are wired to spot patterns - and any contrast to those patterns.  So, the easiest way to add surprise is to add contrast - that little something that is incongruent to the 'usual environment'.
• It might be: unexpected wedding vows; an unexpected reading; an unexpected setting for the celebration, the use of an unexpected colour palette, a flower 'granny' instead of a flower girl, bridesmaids dancing down the aisle.
• Décor examples include: replacing one or two of the standard table setting crookery or glassware with something unexpected (e.g. flamingo pink side plates); using unexpected decorations instead of the usual flowers; creating fun table number holders from unexpected items (e.g. rubber duckies).

• Peek-a-Boo: Hide and Reveal: These are little surprises that pop up at unexpected times and/or in unexpected places. This is a lovely way to add gentle surprise - a reminder of childhood delight. It taps into our impulse to look, search and explore.
• In celebration design, we can create hide-and-reveal surprise in lots of little ways. For example, wrapped favours at each guest place-setting, piñatas, treasure hunts, screening curtains that get pulled back, thank you notes tucked under plates, and so on. Discovering these little treasures brings joy and the surprise element help guests remember the happy moment.
• And not all of the surprises have to be 'public'. Having happy little secrets can bring a great deal of joy. For example, the groom and groomsmen could wear bright and fun socks under their dark and sombre suits. The bride could wear a bright petticoat.

• Weird and Wonderful:  For those of us that are brave enough, creative enough or enough of a "loveable oddball", surprise can take the form of the weird and wonderful. This is where we move beyond the comfortable 'norm'. It's where 'good taste' and 'tradition' are set aside for the truly original, creative and quirky. As Ingrid puts it, good taste offers approval and belonging, but at the cost of originality, inventiveness and creativity.
• For couples getting married, there is intense pressure to stay within the bounds of 'good taste' and tradition, but it can be deeply rewarding and joyous to break free. This could take the form of turning the whole 'white wedding' thing on its head: black Halloween-inspired wedding dresses, fancy-dress weddings, fantasy-themed weddings, and so on.
• For the less brave, consider adding weird and wonderful elements. One couple loved making guacamole together so, instead of doing the usual wedding ceremony rituals, they made guacamole during their wedding ceremony and shared it with their guests. Weird? Yes! Wonderful? Yes!
• This extends to food and catering. Think Heston Blumenthal. Or for a less extreme example, ditch ideas about traditional catering and serve your favourite foods.
• Florals
• Do you need flowers? What could you use instead? A sculpture built from favourite shoes? Lego bricks?
• Play with scale - make huge paper flowers.
• Swap out fresh flower bouquets for flowers made from foam, yarn, buttons.
• If you do use flowers and foliage, think about surprising combinations, shapes and uses. For example, giant floral letters marking out your ceremony space rather than the usual arch or plinth arrangements. Or think about using floral spray to colour your flowers in an unexpected shade - for example, purple daffodils, black hydrangeas.

• Lighting
• Lighting is a great way to draw attention to surprise elements. It can also play a huge role in hide-and-reveal experiences. Consider engaging a lighting technician to create a custom effect.

TRANSCENDENCE

"Glimpses of transcendence give life meaning, purpose and a sense of joy".

It's The Feeling Of...

“Transcendence detaches us from the world, lifting us up above the currents and eddies of our routines. Yet paradoxically, instead of distancing us from what we care about, it seems to bring us closer. Closer to others, closer to what feels truly important, closer, even to ourselves”.

This wonderful quotation from Ingrid really sums-up the sense of joy we can feel from the Transcendence Aesthetic.

It is the elevated, light, airy, almost spiritual feeling you have when floating in a hot-air balloon or looking out from a tree-house. The wonder of ascending the everyday and being able to look down at our world below, seeing it in a new light. 

It's also the awe you feel when looking at some vast, amazing landscape that at once makes you feel small and insignificant, yet connected and 'at one' with the world. We also get this feeling when looking up at the stars and thinking about worlds beyond our own - an awareness of our miniscule part in the universe.

Weddings are an ideal time to move up and beyond the daily grind and allow ourselves to connect with a higher sense of self and the elevating power of love and connection. 

Think...

• Peaceful, floating, delight, contemplative joy. Light-hearted.
• The 'elation of elevation' - a hot-air balloon flight, a gondola ride.
• "Walking on air', 'Being on cloud nine', 'Swept off our feet', 'Uplifted', 'High-spirits'
• The feeling of upwards movement:  Lines and movements that slope upwards are judged as joyful and happy. They are linked to positive feelings and memories.
• Elevation is linked to the clearing of minds and a feeling of  lightness. Worries seem to shrink as we ascend from earth.
• Breaking free from the restraints of gravity associated with joy and happiness, the sky is the province of dreams.

It's The Opposite Of...

Gloomy, heavy environments. Dense and heavy objects and situations.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• It's all about light. Think: 'Seeing the light'.
• Light colour palettes. The white and pale blues of skies.
• Gentle colour gradients.
• Pale surfaces to reflect light. 
• Elimination of dark, gloomy, shadowed areas.
• Creating a calm, euphoric, ethereal feeling.

• Themes
• Could be based on creating spiritual feeling: high-ceilinged churches and architecture, elevated views, spiritual symbolism.
• Could be based around than elevation experience: a hot air balloon ride, a ferris-wheel ride, dinner in a revolving restaurant.
• Could have an 'awe' basis: a venue located in an awe-inspiring landscape, activities that engage guests in an awe-inspiring experience (e.g. wedding ceremony on a cliff top).
• Could have an ethereal, light-as-air theme: Clouds of tuille, floating fabrics, delicate décor.

• Guest Experience
• The aim is to transport your guests up and away from the everyday. 
• Creating a sense of spiritual connection -  of being part of something bigger than our selves and routine life.
• Including activities with a light. airy or spiritual element: e.g. lighting and releasing wishing lanterns, lighting candles, blowing bubbles, waving ribbon wands.
• Consider adding a star-gazing experience at night - the awe and wonder of connecting to worlds up and beyond our own. Star Gazing.

  
  

• Venue
• Seek out venues with tall, graceful arches, high ceilings, slim pillars and upwards-sloping sight lines for a more spiritual feeling. 
• Consider venues with bay windows, observation decks, mezzanine floors - to provide opportunities for guests to feel elevated and to look down on activity below.
• Look for venues that accent height in other ways - beautiful chandeliers, rafters, opportunities to install hanging floral installations.
• Finally, look for venues that offer awe-inspiring views and settings for ceremonies.

• Food and Decor
• Delicate: Think 'light and delicate' décor: furniture with thin, elegant legs and small proportions; ghost chairs; pedestal flower stands; clear acrylic plinths; and so on.

• Light as Air: Bringing in lightness via bubbles, inflatable architecture, bouncy castles, inflatable slides, pool floats.

• Light and airy foods: meringues, mousse, spun sugar, champagne, clear broths.

• Breezy: Light and airy draping - preferably floating in the breeze.  light and airy textiles: organza, muslin, tuille, chiffon.

• Floating: e.g. bubbles, balloons, suspended flower 'clouds', smoke machines, dry ice.
• Stationery decorated with floating symbols: butterflies, birds, balloons, clouds.

• Create  a spiritual mood: Via music, candles, floating lanterns.

• Highlight vertical lines to create an uplifting feeling (e.g. through draping, up-lighting, use of stands and plinths, etc). Other ways to highlight the vertical are: choice of artwork, low furniture, light overhead features, vertical bookshelves, long curtains

• Awe-Inspiring Images: This might be on stationery, signage, photos of places a client has visited, artwork, views from a window, video, slidehows, etc.

• Florals
• Think, light, delicate florals. Clouds of gypsophila. Dandelion clocks. Fluffy heads of pampass grass.
• Arrangements atop tall, elegant stands.
• Arrangements combined with delicate, floating ribbons.

• Lighting
• Its all about light: Creating clear, light spaces, eliminating dark and shaddow,
• Uplighting - using light to guide the eyes upward, to highlight elevated views.

FESTIVITY

"To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with".

It's The Feeling Of...

It's all about others - reaching out to others and connecting with others in order to share the joy of an important milestone in our lives: a marriage, birthday, new baby, new job, promotion, anniversary, and so on.  

At these moments our joy feels like it is bursting and overflowing and we have an irresistible urge to bring together others to join in our delight. This communal sharing of joy may include dance, music, food, performances and activities associated with celebrations in our community - for example, toasts, speeches, cake cutting, garter tossing, etc.  There is a exuberant energy about communal joy. These special times feel vivacious, bubbly, effervescent.

At these times, we temporarily set aside our individual needs, worries and anxieties to join in a collective joy. The temporary nature makes the occasion that much more special, intense and joyous.

In sharing our joy, we increase it for ourselves. And in sharing our joy, we create community, reinforce relationships and feel connected.

In Ingrid's book "Joyful", she labels this aesthetic "Celebration", but as I use this word frequently as an umbrella term for all the kinds of evens you might employ my services as a stylist, I have chosen the label "Festivity".

Think...

• 'Bursting with joy'
• 'United in joy'
• 'Being there for each other'
• Family, friends, community, whanau
• The pop of a champagne cork, of fireworks, or party poppers
• The tingly joy of waving a sparkler or blowing out candles

It's The Opposite Of...

Feeling lonely and isolated. Dull and muted environments and experiences.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Think sparkle and glitter. Gold and Silver. Colours that we associate with special occasions and making a special effort.
• Rich, sumptuous colours - luxurious treats.
• Alternatively, think of fun childhood colours that remind you of kids parties - sprinkles, sweets, dressing-up costumes. This is where playfulness and Festivity meet.

• Themes
• This is the world of parties, the sky is the limit! The uniting theme is the central purpose of bringing people together and making connections. 
• Good food, good music, dancing, talking are the focus: Dance Parties, Dinner Parties, Costume Parties, Murder-Mystery Evenings, Karaoke Parties, etc.
• Quieter options might be gathering around a bonfire, picnics.
• Activity-themed gatherings (e.g. make-up party, Tupperware parties) give guests a focus of chatting and interaction.

• Guest Experience
• Of all the Joy Aesthetics, Festivity is perhaps where Guest Experience is most important. See "people Focus" below.

• Venue
• Most wedding and event venues are designed to cater for the Festivity Aesthetic, which makes venue-finding easier. If you would like to include candle-light, check out any restrictions and requirements. Also look out for outdoor opportunities for fireworks, bonfires and lighting sparklers.

• Food and Décor
• People Focus: The emotions of joy are naturally contagious, we catch it from other’s tone of voice, expressions, gestures. For this joy aesthetic, the most important design element is people (design focus). The aim is to create conditions to capitalise on the inherent tendency of joy to spread and be amplified by sharing with others: 
• Physical closeness is vital to encourage gelling; create clustered seating, eating and socialising spaces.
• Include activities that encourage people to interact with each other. For example, a photo booth - especially if you display the photos. It calls attention to the joyful expressions
• Shrink large spaces by using screens, draping or potted plants.
• Use round tables to maximise interactions.
• Sports colours, uniforms, bridal party clothes, dress-up themes all encourage a sense of shared identity and of being part of something larger than themselves.

• Song and Dance: This is the joy aesthetic most associated with 'partying'. 
• Music transforms ordinary situations into celebrations and ignites an urge within us to join in either by singing, dancing, or simply tapping our feet.
• Music creates a physiological response – synchronicity. This is a feeling of "collective effervescence" and absorption in community. It is very energising and can result in even the most shy of us belting out a favourite song or boogying down on the dance floor.
• This feeling of synchronicity lies at the heart building unity and bonding as has been part of human nature and community building since ancient times.

• Bursting With Joy: This is all about the natural release of energy we feel when celebrating with others. 
• Think: carnivales - oversized and OTT costumes, sparkling surfaces, bright energetic colours, radiating shapes, upbeat music, cheerleader pompoms, tassels, fringes, sequins, expansive shapes, oversized shapes, decadent decoration. These all act to amplify the sense of joy and energy. 
• Also think: bursting shapes - like champagne corks popping, popcorn popping, pulling party poppers, bursting flower shapes, fireworks, sparklers, throwing confetti.

• Sparkle and Flare: Since ancient times when we danced around fires, we have associated sparkle and flare with celebration. Sparks of light make the world seem effervescent and drive away the shadows.
• We can recreate this through fireworks, sparklers, candles, lanterns, fairy lights, twinkle lights, festoon lights and bonfires. 
• Other décor items that add sparkle are chandeliers, crystals, mirror disco balls, reflective surfaces and sparkly textiles such as lame and organza.
• Tinsel, sequins, rhinestones and glitter can be added to stationery, signs and table décor for extra sparkle.
• Add sparkle in your food and drinks through champagne, fizzy cocktails, gold leaf garnishes, edible glitter.

• Oversized Features: Giant, oversized items are often linked to celebrations and joy - winning a giant stuffed animal, receiving a giant cheque, enjoying a magnum of champagne, ordering a stretch limo, decorating a xmas tree that reaches to the ceiling, having giant number balloons at birthday. The general rule is: the bigger the better. Making something bigger than normal makes things feel more festive, more special. It's linked to the extra effort and expense needed to produce it and signals to the community that this event is important. Oversized items also create excellent focal points for your gathering.
• Adding some of the above ideas to your celebration can help create this effect. Other ideas include using giant helium balloon with huge tassels for décor.
• Oversized food items are also fun: tiers of cake, champagne bowls, chocolate fountains, donut or macaron towers. 
• The generosity inherent in oversized items overlaps nicely with the abundance aesthetic.

• Traditions: As mentioned earlier, this joy aesthetic also encompasses all those rituals and activities we associated with celebrating joy communally: blowing out candles, cutting cake, making toasts, speeches, tossing bouquets, etc. These make up the universal 'language' of celebration, so consider adding one or two of these as well.

• Florals
• Think bling: Add florals to shiny, sparkly container. Hang crystals from them. Incorporate fairy lights. Spray sparkle finish on the leaves and petals. Even consider colouring leaves, stems and flowers gold, silver or bronze.

• Lighting
• Sparkle and flare are an integral part of this aesthetic, discussed above.

CULTURE

"Celebrating what makes us US"

It's The Feeling Of...

Honouring and feeling proud of who we are - our heritage, culture, family, background, identity, choices, personality and preferences. It's the joy of being seen, loved and accepted for who we are by the people we love and care about. 

This aesthetic is closely linked to Festivity in that it revolves around connection. Indeed Fettel Lee does not include this as a separate and distinct aesthetic in her book "Joyful". However, in my experience working as a Wedding and Event Stylist in New Zealand, many couples have a strong desire (almost need) to include Culture in their celebration design. This has included many national identities: Maori, Tongan, Samoan, Chinese, English and Scottish to name a few. 

In addition, I've had the honour of working with gay couples who want to express a strong sense of Pride through Rainbow symbolism. Finally, I've had the pleasure of working with older couples getting married. For them, there was a need to reflect this difference in their wedding design. 

This need to express Culture and affirm identity is, I believe, strongly linked to the deep, life-affirming joy of being accepted.

Think...

• Cultural rituals, costumes, dance, symbolism and language.
• National identity, native plants, animals, flags, colours.
• Pride. Respect. Acceptance.

It's The Opposite Of...

Cookie-cutter weddings. Traditional white weddings. One-size-fits-all. Standardisation. Feeling oucast and rejected.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Inspired by your culture and identity. This could be the colours of your national flag, an native plant or animal (e.g. NZ pohutukawa), an iconic symbol (e.g the Pride Rainbow).
• It might also simply be inspired by an item that has deep personal meaning to you and symbolises all that you are are. For example, a treasured piece of jewellery.

• Themes
• These are strongly grounded in culture and identity.

• Guest Experience
• For those 'outside' the culture, it is a chance to see, understand and accept it. A chance to make connects and forge community.
• For those 'within', it's a chance to express and celebrate who you are. To join with others to celebrate your identity and to see, understand and accept those who are different to you.

• Venue
• There may be halls, churches, Maraes and other gathering spaces that are strongly associated with your culture. These are a great place to start your venue search. When I got married, my hubby and I chose the Hall where we both practiced Tai Chi. This was perfect for our Taoist-inspired ceremony. The walls were already decorated appropriately.
• Alternatively, seek our spaces that feel like they are part of your identity and community. Or consider hiring a marquee on family (or friends) land that is part of your life story.

• Food and Décor
• Food is one of the most important ways we connect with our culture. Celebrations are an ideal opportunity to share your cultural foods with others. This may mean an entire menu based around cultural food, or the addition of a few favourites for your guests to try.
• Include textiles that celebrate your culture. Table toppers, napkins, napkin wraps are small ways that a bit of colour and identity can be added to break up the usual event decorating white.
• Entertainment. song and dance can all add a strong cultural element. Ensure that your layout plan allows room for groups to perform.
• Symbolism can be added to stationery, signage, personalised favours.
• For weddings, the ceremony space is an important place to express and afform identity and culture. Think about rituals and customs that you would like to include and what décor items might be needed to facilitate these. 

• Florals
• Choosing flowers strongly associated with your heritage, upbringing and/or national identity adds a powerful layer of symbolism. For a bride with a Scottish father, we added Scotch Thistle to her personal flowers. For a Maori/Samoan wedding, we combined Hibiscus, Frangipani, woven NZ flax flowers.
• If it proves difficult to access fresh florals that represent your culture, don't be afraid to explore Faux options. These are of exception quality now and can blend seamlessly with fresh.

• Lighting
• Lighting can reinforce important customs and rituals. And as for the Festivity Aesthetic, it can be used to bring people together and help them connect.
  

RENEWAL

"Renewal is about the joy of anticipation, new beginnings, hope for the future".

It's The Feeling Of...

Being surrounded by environments that make us feel alive, that remind us that we can start again, grow, improve, make our lives better. It's about new beginnings and hope for the future. Of being aware of the circle of life, of seasonality and the dynamic nature of things. 

As Fetell Lee puts it:

“In renewal we find perhaps the clearest expression of the truth that underlies all of the aesthetics in this book, that the drive toward joy is synonymous with the drive toward life. From that first revelation of the ancestral link between bright colour and ripeness, to the simplicity of the s curve, this correlation has held true. Joy evolved for the express purpose of helping to steer us toward conditions that would encourage us to flourish. It is the inner guide to the things that animate, stimulate and sustain us. Put more simply, joy is what makes life worth living”.

Without the joy represented by renewal, we might be surviving, but we’re not thriving.

Weddings are the ultimate celebration of renewal - when a couple chose to set out on a new pathway together.

Think...

• Seeing the first of the Spring blossom.
• Shoots pushing up through the soil. Grasses growing upwards.
• Fern leaves unfurling.
• The verdant, exuberant joy, hope and vivacity of Spring.
• A sense of the slate being wiped clean.
• Life has its ups and downs. And in the same way, joy goes through cycles. The low times help us better appreciate the joyous times.
• New beginnings: the birth of a child/grand child, a marriage, the end of an addiction, finding a new faith, a near-death experience, being given a second-change, surviving a serious illness. 
• Even smaller moments offer a sense of new beginnings: a new haircut, fresh laundry, cleaning, a hot shower.
• The resilience that can be found in the knowledge that good times will return again.

It's The Opposite Of...

Lifeless, static environments. Of being stuck in one place or plodding along the same old path.

Design Ideas

• Colour
• The verdant lush greens of a Spring landscape.
• The riot of colours from a bed of Spring Bulbs.
• The delicate pinks from Japanese Cherry Blossom.

• Themes
• New Beginnings is a wonderful theme for weddings and the birth of a baby. 
• Celebrating a season: The hope of a new Spring, Winter Wonderland, Autumn Leaves, Summer fun (see Décor ideas below).
• Rural, rustic themed celebrations affirming our links to nature and seasonality.

• Venue
• Seek out a venue that is connected to nature - farms, vineyards, gardens. Ideally, they will provide opportunities for outdoor celebrations and great indoor/outdoor flow.

• Food and Décor
• Seasonal Produce: One way to connect with the cycles of life and reestablish our link with nature is to focus on seasonal produce - sourcing food from farmer's markets, creating a seasonal menu, celebrating local foods and suppliers.

• Seasonal Symbolism: Incorporate seasonal symbols, crafts, activities and rituals into your celebration. 
• For example having a Xmas-themed wedding, adding a spooky halloween-inspired surprise for guests, having a picnic in a daffodil field.
• Other seasonal/cyclical moments you could include in your celebration are: First snow fall, first Autumn Rain, Harvest Moon, First fire lit, first day without winter jacket. These all provide anticipation of change, hope for renewal.
• Adding a garden elements and living plants connects us with nature and the seasons.

• Spring: Planning a celebration in Spring can reinforce the feeling of new beginnings, hope and renewal. 
• Look for a venue that maximises this effect - looking out over a field of daffodils, a farm with Spring Lambs.
• The Japanese Cherry Blossom and Cherry Blossom Festival are potent symbols of the Renewal Aesthetic. To harness this symbolism, ideally find a venue that has Cherry Blossom growing. If this isn't possible, add Cherry blossom florals, blossom symbols on stationery and signage. blossom textiles on soft furnishings and clothing.  
• Include Spring symbols, colours and florals in décor, stationery and signage.

• Unfurling Curves: Coils and S Curves are associated with new growth, shoots, fern fronds, transformation. Décor items with curved edges, coiled rugs, spiral motifs, spiral stair-cases can all add to a celebration based on the mergence aesthetic.

• Flowers: The association of flowers with celebration and joy goes back to ancient times. Their expansive shape, and opening, unfurling movement suggest emergence, becoming and the start of a new cycle. They are also associated with anticipation, survival and flourishing as they herald future food/crops.
• The joy associated with flowers can be achieved even when access to fresh flowers is limited. Quality Faux flowers can give the same uplifting experience (...although the sad, dirty plastic flowers you see in vases in cheap restaurants can have the opposite effect!)
• Other options include adding floral motifs to décor in the form of floral prints on textiles and stationery, floral embroidery, paper flowers, paintings of flowers.
• Blooming shapes can be added via flared pendant lights, circle skirts, peplums, bell sleeves.

• Florals
• This joy aesthetic is all about flowers. Whether overflowing in abundant urns or simple posies in vases, Faux or in floral prints, try to include flowers and floral motifs in some form.
• To enhance the feeling of seasonality, use flowers that are iconic for the season: Daffodils, and Cherry Blossom in Spring, Peony in late Spring, Hydrangea in Summer, Chrysanthemum in Autumn.
• Grass seed heads can also add a seasonal feeling. Some, such as pampas and bunny tails have a strong link to hot summers and the beach.
• Using living plants for floral decorations help to create a direct connection to nature. Flowering and deciduous plants also reflect seasonal change. Or use fruit and vegetables as part of the floral arrangements. Olives, lemons and figs pair up beautifully with a rustic Italian themed celebration.

• Lighting
• Lighting effects can enhance a seasons-based theme: Bright, colourful lighting for spring, cool colour-washes for a Winter wonderland, warm glowing lighting for Summer and Autumn.
• Candles are associated with new starts and new hope. Consider adding a candle lighting ritual to a wedding ceremony, or get family to light wishing candles at a baby-naming ceremony. Light and release wishing lanterns.

MAGIC

"Magic blurs possible and impossible, igniting curiosity, wonder and joy"

It's The Feeling Of...

That sense of wonder we all had as children, but lost somewhere along the way when we grew up and the world of science and 'facts' took over from our childhood world of magic. As Fetell Lee put it:

“Wonder is a marvelous word to describe our response to magic because it is both a noun and a verb. When we feel wonder (noun) it prompts us to wonder (verb) and then go in search of an answer. It pulls us forward into learning and exploration.”

It's also the feeling of enchantment. As children, we believed in a world of Fairy Tales, Make-Believe, Superheroes, Fairies, Father Christmas and Mermaids. As we age, we stop believing in these, but we don't lose our desire to feel a sense of enchantment. Luckily weddings and celebrations are an ideal opportunity to recreate it.

As adults, a sense of wonder and enchantment is created when we get a feeling that our world is bigger and more amazing than we imagine. When the Laws of Physics and Nature appear to get broken. When we experience extraordinary coincidences. When we travel to new places and experience new cultures. When we get to experience the sublime.

 

It also happens when we allow ourselves to get lost in a magic world created in a book or film. For a while, we can leave reality behind and reconnect with our inner child.

Weddings are an ideal excuse to create a magical world where we can escape the mundane and every day. It's when brides can wear fairytale white dresses and couples can reenact the "happily every after" story. 

Think...

• The wonder of seeing beams of sunlight through forest branches.
• Gazing at a scene of extraordinary and outstanding natural beauty.
• Experiencing the Aurora Borealis. 
• Fireflies, flying a kite, watching shooting stars, watching lightening storms.
• Being surprised at a magic show.

It's The Opposite Of...

Our ordinary, plain, banal everyday lives. 

Design Ideas

• Colour
• Fluorescent paints made to glow using blue light.
• Iridescence – feathers, wings, long been considered magical, pearlescent paints, magical makeup, lustrous make up, fairy princess costumes.
• Shot-effect woven fabric and paints – look different colour in different angles.
• Also consider using dark, moody and mysterious colours - deep blues and purples - as backgrounds for glowing and sparkling lights.

• Themes
• Fairytales, Childhood Books (e.g. Harry Potter).
• Alice in Wonderland. 
• Magic shows and illusion.
• Transformation.

• Guest Experience
• It's all about immersing your guests in a world of wonder and enchantment. Giving them an opportunity to leave their everyday lives behind.
• Provide opportunities to guests to experience 'magic'. For example in their food (see below), magic shows, entertainment, magical surrounds, transformations.
• Add interactive opportunities - magic tricks and illusions at the guest tables. 
• Give guests Instax cameras to experience the 'magic' of photographs appearing in front of their eyes.
• Photo-booths with costumes gives guests the opportunity to step into a make-believe world.

• Venue
• Performance spaces make an ideal backdrop for creating a magical experience. They also make it easier to host magical performances and stage illusions.
• Modern art galleries and opt-art galleries make great settings for magical illusions.
• Olde-Worlde venues are ideal for enchanted fairy-tale themed weddings.
• Venues with gardens and wooded areas are perfect for enchanted garden and woodland themes.

• Food and Décor
• Illusions: Use fishing line to suspend objects/floral installations, mirrors to alter the perception of spaces, infinity mirrors, optical illusion, op-art, trompe-de-oile artwork.

• Enchanted Worlds; Use costumes, props and décor to recreate scenes for a favourite fairytale or book. Even without a fairytale, theme, add enchantment via 'other-worldly' scenery and props including:

• Fog machines add instant enchantment. Great for the dance floor.
• Indoor water features (especially if they have unusual water flows).
• Enchanted forests using faux trees, garlands, foraged greenery.
• Projected images on walls and floors.
• Mood music.

• Magical Movement: mobiles, wind chimes, bells moving in breeze – all create a sense of magical movement.

• Food Service and Presentation: Cakes that seem to defy gravity, drinks that change colour, platters served on top of dry ice, food that transforms in front of guests (e.g. coffee poured into a chocolate shell that melts). Even if the food is fairly standard, an sublime service experience can feel magical. I remember at my wedding I was expecting my wedding cake to be served as a plain slice on a plate. Instead it was 'magically' transformed with a spun sugar garnish and berry coulis. I actually cried at the thoughtful surprise.

• Transformations: Turning an ordinary space into something new and unexpected. Or consider adding something new and unexpected to your wedding ceremony. Have a costume change ( ...an excuse to splurge on a second outfit).

• Reveals: The use of curtains and screens to 'reveal' a wonderful, magical scene. This is where Surprise and Magic meet.

• Florals
• Combine with lighting to create glowing effects.
• Hanging and suspended floral installations.
• Adding enchanting accessories - fairies, mushrooms, etc.

• Lighting
• Lighting effects are a great way to create a sense of wonder and magic. Use uplighting to make features glow (think: branches of a tree lit-up), spotlights to enhance illusions, blue light to make fluorescent paint glow.
• Prisms to reveal the colours hidden in sunlight and create indoor rainbows. Mirror balls to create 'magical' moving light effects. Giant kaleidoscopes.
• Underwater lights to make the water glow.
• Seed lights in jars to create a Firefly effect.
• Even the simple act of turning off all the lights and using only candlelight can transform a space and create a magical world removed from everyday reality.

A FINAL THOUGHT FROM INGRID FETELL LEE'S BOOK "JOYFUL":

“At the heart of celebration is a kind of mathematical paradox. The more we share joy, the more it grows. The implication of this is that we should manage joy in the exact opposite way that we manage money. We should spend it all at every chance we get. What celebration does, with music and fireworks, giant balloons and glitter, is broadcast our joy far and wide so that others can join in. Because the more generous we are with our joy, the more we have for ourselves.”

If you would like more help to design your perfect joyous celebration, please get in touch: lyndal@littlelaceflowercompany.co.nz

Image Credits: Jo Moore Photographer, Billie Brook Photography. Amy Schultz Photography, Isabel Sheat, Harper's Bazaare, 2019, Dollar Gill (Unsplash), thePhoto.nz, Analuisa Gambo (Unsplash), Emily Shirron (Unsplash), Tanya Dusett (Unsplash), Chris Zhang (Unsplash), Danie Franco (Unsplash), Khadija Yousaf (Unsplash), Noelle Ho (Unsplash), Aleza Van der Werff (Unsplash), Teddy Osterblom (Unsplash), Shelly Pauls (Unsplash), Jan Canty (Unsplash), Timo Volz (Unsplash), Foto Pettine (Unsplash), Annie Spratt (Unsplash), Harry Grout (Unsplash), Bespoke Brides.

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